1. |
The Next World
03:26
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We hoard cash
To take along to the next world
We don’t go out
We’re saving up for the next world
We choose the path of denial
We see this world as a trial run
We’d visit you
But what will they say in the next world?
Have no doubt
We will be friends in the next world
We’re just planning ahead so
It’s always early to bed we go
Throw on your weeds of woe
This earthly life is nothing but a show
We’re keeping meek and mild
But in the next world that’s when we’ll go wild
Too full-on
How will you fare in the next world?
Ambitious plans
They do not count in the next world
Some people always want their say
But if you ignore them they’ll fade away
Throw on your weeds of woe
This earthly life is nothing but a show
We’re keeping meek and mild
But in the next world that’s when we’ll go wild
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2. |
Creeping Buttercup
02:58
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He went down to the garden when he felt riled
He assaulted the plants that were growing wild
The creeping buttercup
He chopped every tendril up
He went down to the garden when he felt riled
He tortured the wilderness into shape
Not a weed in the world had a chance to escape
Tether-toad, devil’s guts
Nothing left as he hacks and cuts
He tortured the wilderness into shape
It was spick
And it was span
It was all mapped out
According to plan
What was rank
Was destroyed
There was order
But somewhere the joy
Was left behind
They’ve made Sunday the busiest day of the week
All this furious mowing there’s no time to speak
But during working hours
The loudest things are flowers
If you’re seen in the suburbs they call you a freak
He went down to the garden when he felt riled
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3. |
Working on My Plan
03:11
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I was working on my plan
To strike it rich in Kazakhstan
Find work as an uncompromising genius
But the plan misfired
And the Kazakhs sent me away
I’ve being practicing my chops
The amp’s turned on and never stops
Relaying signals fashioned by my twiddling
But the neighbours moan
I’ll have to find another place where I can drone
But watch out if you’re not a fan
Cause I’ve been working on my plan
I was walking in the shoes
That gave me such a nasty bruise
And trying to make my way back to the border
Till I found there was an ocean in my way
I’ve resigned myself to fate
And Bruno’s unrelenting hate
Sleeping in the garage of my brother-in-law
But it can’t be long till I hit the charts
Cause that’s how every movie starts
The hero sticks it to the man
So I’ve been working on my plan
I was taking frantic notes
On how to sow those wild oats
The uncouth family friends were always talking about
But the theory doesn’t always work that way
Being a monk or being a drunk
Or drumming for a Christian punk band
Doesn’t look like there are many options left for me
But I won’t despair, through the power of prayer
Or the power of my creepy stare
At least I’ll get to drive their van
Yes I’ve been working on my plan
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4. |
In Love with Death
03:45
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Her suitors come and go they come and go
They make the same mistakes
For they do not know
They all have too much life
Her ideal partner wears a robe
And holds a scythe
Cause she’s in love with death
It’s all she wants to know
It’s all she thinks about
It’s all she dreams about
Her dates think chocolates or flowers
The opera or Macbeth
Or crystal meth
No use when she’s
In love with death
Her parents wonder
What they’re doing wrong
She’s always writing
Those depressing songs
When they’re the ones with woes
They’re losing stock as
Down and down the market goes
Now they’re in love with death
It’s all they think about
It’s all they talk about
It’s all they dream about
They’ve got the sleeping pills prepared
From visits by the bank
They’re feeling short of breath
Now they’re in love with death
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5. |
Song in My Head
03:05
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What will I do with the song in my head
Will none of these sentences ever be read
Warden explains: pencil equals a year
Record exec is guided by what his kids hear
They need a gimmick
A hymn to the great
You should learn to keep silent
And submit to your fate
Do you fear for your sanity?
Maybe there’s cause
For those songs don’t belong in
Feeble heads such as yours
What will I do with the song in my head
If the other kids notice me writing I’m dead
Tear up the notebook and stab with the pen
It’s happened before I don’t want it to happen again
Chorus
What will I do with the song in my head
The neighbours complain if I so much as tread
They can’t understand what I’m doing all day
Music’s not work and you know it’s not going to pay
Chorus
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6. |
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I almost believed
There was profit from madness
And joy from dejection
Good lessons from sadness
Compared to the lies
That they taught at School prison
They praised manual labour
The Lord who had risen
And that wasn’t all I got wrong
That wasn’t all I got wrong
The architects told us
Their sheds were artistic
They’re great fun to live in
If you’re masochistic
This city is snarled
In perpetual gridlock
It goes on forever
From rich block to poor block
In the town that got everything wrong
The town that got everything wrong
It got the best grades
For its standard of living
A people so comfortable
And unforgiving
When hours to the west
Lies a city much tougher
That won’t make you feel
You were put here to suffer
In the town that got everything wrong
The town that got everything wrong
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7. |
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I wouldn’t bother with you
As just a friend
But any sly intention
Would probably end it
What the hell am I supposed to do then
I sidestep and pretend
Waiting for the goddess to descend
Once papier-mâché godheads
Would emerge from above
Solving such sordid problems
As cashflow and love
But now that there’s nothing or nowhere for the audience to spend
We’re waiting for the goddess to descend
I have gone through the ritual
I’ve done all I can
Laid out the lines and candles
According to plan
Now I must sit here in silence
Hoping that soon this will end
Waiting for the goddess to descend
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8. |
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They don’t make them
Like that anymore
Oh he’s a hard case
At his place
Rest assured
You won’t be bored
No they don’t make them
Like that anymore
Oh he’s a real mate
Damn straight
He’s solid gold
Once you’ve joined his fold
And he’s old
And he’s wise
But I’ve seen the madness
Lurking in his eyes
With his dogs
And his wine
They can’t hide the fear
Behind the healthy shine
They don’t make them like that anymore
We used to run wild
They’re so mild
They can’t be late for work
They don’t make them like that anymore
The liquor’s flowing
It’s glowing
A beacon in the murk
Chorus
No they don’t make them like that anymore
No drinking swearing
Or caring
The puritans are back
They don’t make them like that anymore
But start your praying
They’re saying
He’s coming to attack
With his dogs… And he’s old…
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9. |
Vodka Slide
03:01
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We’re all going down the vodka slide
Drink up
Mind your heads
And step inside
We’re all going down the vodka slide
Hold on
Shut your eyes
Enjoy the ride
If you’ve lost direction
You won’t meet with our rejection
You are not the only one without a clue
Bottles have been broken
Brutal language has been spoken
If you lose your entry token mine will do
We’re all going down the vodka slide
Drink up
Mind your heads
And step inside
We’re all going down the vodka slide
Hold on
Shut your eyes
Enjoy the ride
It will take you far away
Beyond the myth of Saturday
Erase the memory of the daily grind
Better than a holiday
In Spain or Greece or Castor Bay
You’ll find you travel further in your mind
The lights go out across the park
We've learned to hurtle through the dark
And not to scream or otherwise complain
We do not fear this endless rush
Could churn our minds into a mush
This world is not a playground for the sane
We’re all going down the vodka slide
Drink up
Take your time
Forget your pride
We’re all going down the vodka slide
Drink up…. Drink up
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10. |
National Insecurity
02:50
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On the shortest day of the winter
When the world got so painfully thin
We couldn’t escape from this country
That didn’t want to let us in
They ask how are you going to support him?
And who is going to protect her?
And we hoped they won’t see past the lies
That were told by the lie detector
National insecurity
They’d rather shut their eyes
While liberty is burning up
And freedom fries
At the end of a red-alert decade
That made sure we were always afraid
They didn’t want us to let on
About the mess that they had made
They said it was done in our best interests
For the sake of the common good
That the worse they appeared, the better they were
So the enemy misunderstood
National insecurity
We’re scared out of our skins
Better keep one bad person out
Than let a thousand good ones in
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11. |
What Do I Do if I Drop?
03:23
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What do I do if I drop?
Don’t drop
Only son
What do I do if I fail?
Don’t fail
Only son
You’re the one
We’re counting on
The snares are laid
The nets are skewed
We cannot feel
Your gratitude
What do I do if I crack?
Don’t crack
Only son
What do I do if I break?
Don’t break
Only son
You made this life
All on your own
Your frame is warped
Your mind is blown
You’ll have to face
This one alone
What do I do if I stop?
Don’t stop
Only son
You’re a mess
You’ve come undone
We’ve prodded you
To reap the crop
You’ll have to run
Until you drop
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12. |
She's Green
02:41
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Alone at the end of the pier
You were safely packed away
They thought you’d be less trouble
Trapped down here
A deserted resort
Where you cannot be caught
Alone at the end of the week
With the silence all around
You can hear the statue start to speak
The Victorian Queen
In her corpulent green
I greet you my far-flung dominion
Did we need you at all I lose track of our conquests
You’re not India
We export snobbery
And you work in our bars
They know that their empire is gone
Still imperial values somewhere somehow sometimes linger on
Every coin that you flip
Every bill you can’t rip
She’s green and she’s always in mourning
With a mean queen like that
How could you not feel awkward
He’s on Albert Street
She’s on Victoria Street
They’ll become one on Queen
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Simon Patterson and the Bichan Orchestra Auckland, New Zealand
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